### A moderator almost immediately voted to close it as off-topic. Why?

I am the moderator in question. The help pages clearly state:

> You should only ask practical, answerable questions **based on actual problems** that you face.

Source [What types of questions should I avoid asking?][1]

If you can convince me you have an real problem to solve I will happily reopen your question.

> the vast majority of the userbase are technical users that enjoy the occasional laugh on a workday

You should come and join [Root Access](https://chat.stackexchange.com/rooms/118/root-access) (the SuperUser Chat room) if you want an occasional laugh.


  [1]: https://superuser.com/help/dont-ask