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Rarely can I ask a question or provide some kind of input without someone having a problem with it and it’s getting on my nerves. To me, they all seem like great questions and answers, so I figured you guys must just be hard to please or something. However, I can’t help but notice, there are questions with 30+ votes, so there must be a better way for me to communicate my input, that won’t rub people the wrong way. Right? So how can I ask better questions & give better answers?

Please resist the temptation to down vote and trash this question. Help me to help you. Cheers.

  • Need help? Come to chat and we'll give you some tips. – bwDraco Oct 22 '15 at 16:35
  • I believe there was one that I commented on that was straight up asking for opinions that has since been deleted. – EBGreen Oct 22 '15 at 18:16
  • @EBGreen Thats what prompted me to ask this question. It wasn't asking for opinions. I told you this. – tjt263 Oct 22 '15 at 18:19
  • @Ramhound Yeah, I have deleted some. – tjt263 Oct 22 '15 at 18:20
  • Whether you wanted opinions or not, the question you asked and especially the wording you used would have produced answers that were opinion based. As I said at the time, that was simply my opinion of the situation and that it takes more than one non-moderator feeling that way to close a question. – EBGreen Oct 22 '15 at 18:21
  • @Ramhound Your comments are confusing. You went from "I see nothing wrong with any of your questions that you have asked." to listing a bunch of problems ten minutes later. But yeah.. If I'm satisfied with an answer, I will mark it as accepted. If I agree/disagree with feedback, I will generally express it. If the community seems to really have an issue with it, I will usually take it down rather than have it littering the site. – tjt263 Oct 22 '15 at 18:37
  • @Ramhound That seems unnecessary. If it comes to that I will more than likely just rescind my contributions, kill my user account, and be done with it. – tjt263 Oct 22 '15 at 18:52
  • @Ramhound If I can see how to do so, I will. If I can't, I will give others the opportunity to do so. If it's obviously unappreciated, in the wrong place etc. I will just kill it. ---- I would rather just ask questions that others will perceive as "better", then there won't be a problem. That is my reason for posting this. – tjt263 Oct 22 '15 at 19:06
  • As always. Examples please! – Journeyman Geek Oct 22 '15 at 23:26
  • @JakeGould An edit that just replaces ' with seems rather pointless - "no improvement whatsoever - This edit does not make the post even a little bit easier to read, easier to find, more accurate or more accessible." – DavidPostill Oct 23 '15 at 11:39
  • @DavidPostill There is also a copy edit where I change .. to .. My edits often stem from me reading a post of some kind and then editing as I go along. It helps me read the post and also cleans things up in many cases. Disagree? Feel free to roll back. – JakeGould Oct 23 '15 at 11:50
4

It seems like you are mixing up comments from other users asking or clarification with feedback in the form of up votes or down votes.

Rarely can I ask a question or provide some kind of input without someone having a problem with it and it’s getting on my nerves. To me, they all seem like great questions and answers, so I figured you guys must just be hard to please or something.

While I want to state, “Stop taking things so personally…” a quick look at your questions and answers on the main site shows nothing really unusual or negative to your interactions here that I can see.

I do see the comments to this question that are a bit heated but still… You seem to be doing fine. There’s no down votes and no up votes to that question right now, so I don’t see what the issue is. The comments are simply people attempting to help you clarify the question so it can avoid being shut down, down voted, closed or deleted. So please don’t take that stuff negatively.

However, I can’t help but notice, there are questions with 30+ votes, so there must be a better way for me to communicate my input, that won’t rub people the wrong way. Right? So how can I ask better questions & give better answers?

You’re saying two things here that show you are a bit disconnected from the way Stack Exchange sites work. First you say you are noticing questions with 30+ votes and then you state you want to make sure you don’t “…rub people the wrong way.” This all points to two problems, and none of them from us:

  1. You are looking at the reputation points as some grand reward and perhaps even an entitlement.
  2. You are perceiving the reason for this lack of reputation points on your account as stemming from you “rubbing people the wrong way.”

These are not issues with any of us, but issues with you and your ideas of what this site is, what your participation in this site entails and what perceived “rewards” are connected to such participation.

This is the simplest explanation about everything on the Stack Exchange sites: Content is the main focus; users are not. If you post content that other users appreciate, you get rewarded with reputation points. But the main purpose of reputation points is to help moderate and clean the community.

Sure, I personally have 16,000+ reputation points and I am somewhat proud of that. But this is not a competition. You should not be thinking I am “better” than you and you should not believe that you cannot speak out against a higher rep user if you have a legitimate complaint.

In this case, you have a misunderstanding at best, but ultimately you have 100% no complaint. You need to stop taking things personally especially when—in all honesty—you seem like a fine user already whose adding positive things to the community.

Please resist the temptation to down vote and trash this question. Help me to help you. Cheers.

Again, you are taking all of this way to personally. I will state that looking at your questions/answers on the main site compared to here, your activity on the main site is fine with no down votes. But on this question on the meta site you are getting down votes because honestly… What are you complaining about?

You’ve only been a member for two months. Hang around more and maybe you will post a question or answer that catches on fire or perhaps results in someone rewarding you with extra reputation points. But just chill out.

Also, up/down voting in meta is fairly meaningless and doesn’t impact your main user account. And ultimately the act of up/down voting is just a personal opinion so best leave it at that.

  • 2
    This answer is very good. The most important thing to do, is if you do receive feedback about an question or answer, is to have an open mind, most feedback provided actually is attempting to help. We want answers, we have tons of answers, we have less answers. We also want questions that can be answered, that are on topic, so if you have a question you have any doubts will be on topic ask in chat ( or here ). – Ramhound Oct 23 '15 at 12:22
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    My comment was suppose to say "We want answers, we have tons of questions, we have less answers". The point is and this is from my personal perspective. I expect more out of questions, so better answers can be submitted, so I am a great deal more open about my opinion on the quality of questions then answers. – Ramhound Oct 23 '15 at 17:00
  • Please address the actual question. FYI: I'm not complaining about anything. I have no complaint. I'm not concerned with personal opinions regarding feedback, voting, reputation, or whatever else. I'm concerned with asking better questions and providing better answers. I want to improve the quality of my personal contributions to the site. That is all. – tjt263 Oct 26 '15 at 21:49
  • @tjt263 Why is it “our” job to explain this to you? If someone places comments on your content explaining how to improve your content that is the way you can learn how to ask better questions or answers. Simple as that. This actual “question” seems to be you are unable to understand what a constructive comment is versus something you should really be upset about. Instead of letting comments “get on your nerves” just follow the advice of others in what they ask in the comments and take it from there. Like here on this question; heed the comments. – JakeGould Oct 26 '15 at 21:53
  • I forgot to mention; I actually received a letter of complaint from Stack Exchange moderators regarding the low quality of my questions and answers. Also, about your comment; "..you should not believe that you cannot speak out against a higher rep user if you have a legitimate complaint." I would like to agree with you here but unfortunately it would not reflect my actual experience, interacting with the site. Just saying. – tjt263 Oct 26 '15 at 22:05
  • Wait, what? I never implied that it was "your" job to do anything. I'm simply requesting help from the community at large. You seem to be making a lot of incorrect assumptions about the nature of my query and about me personally. I understand constructive criticism and I'm not upset or whatever. I just feel that your answer doesn't actually address the original question and I'm pretty sure your analysis of my situation is an inaccurate overgeneralisation. Maybe it applies to others, I'm not sure. I just want to ask better questions and provide better solutions; it's actually really simple. – tjt263 Oct 26 '15 at 22:46
  • @tjt263 Your question: “Rarely can I ask a question or provide some kind of input without someone having a problem with it and it’s getting on my nerves.” My answer: Stop taking any interaction so personally. Including this one. – JakeGould Oct 26 '15 at 22:53
  • My question: "How can I ask better questions & give better answers?" As I said, I'm not upset and I'm not taking anything personally. Like; not at all. I only commented to let you know that I read and acknowledge your post, but won't be selecting it as the correct answer. No hard feelings, okay? Thanks for trying. – tjt263 Oct 26 '15 at 23:09

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protected by JakeGould Oct 26 '15 at 21:53

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